Sprinting Straight Belligerence

88 Miles Per Hour!!

2010-07-01T12:03:00.003-05:00

I am a car guy. I love Hondas and am currently driving my fourth Honda car and 6th Honda vehicle counting the motorcycles I used to own. While I do appreciate and actually long for a few select other models made by different manufacturers, I have always been drawn to Honda's reliability, price, and their racing heritage. The picture to the right is my current ride and more specifically, is me seeing how fast I can drive in really small s curves at an autocross event. The title of the even should have been "Don't pee your pants". To this day I have never before or since put a car through that kind of punishment and agility testing, but was amazed at what my little stocky Civic was capable of. This was my first and only event to date and I actually placed 3rd out of five in my class.

Some people would say that since I like Honda's and plan on making some upgrades that I am a ricer. I would respond to that by saying that I do not associate with anyone that gets excited when they hear things like "My ride is slammed". I would also like to point out that anyone who thinks that painting their car the same color as a comic book superhero's jumpsuit would find their time well spent in seeking out a suitable cliff to plunge said car off of and put it out of its misery. Sure, you can call me a snob when it comes to this issue, but that's because it is something that I am passionate about.

We Actually Met Once, But You Probably Don't Remember..

2009-10-21T10:19:00.003-05:00

Wow, the fact that I am typing on my blog or the fact that I was actually able to remember how to log in are both feats in and of themselves. It's been nearly three years since I last posted and so much has happened since then, that I do not even know where to begin. I guess I will start with the fact that I got married this year to a wonderful woman named Kathryn who I adore and she adores me. I purchased my first home back in March of 2007. It isn't much, but it's home. We have two dogs, both Boxers, named Max and Sara and we love them dearly. I left my career in the restaurant industry a little over a year ago in order to save my sanity and possibly my life and now work in the mysterious world of Government Contracting. My mother left the midwest in the spring of 2007 and currently resides north of the Bay Area in California. We miss her, but are happy that she is enjoying her newfound adventure. My sister has also departed the Bog O! to pursue a new life near Denver, CO. And one of my former fellow bloggers and good friends now resides in D.C., and as I write this it seems that most of our friends and family have gone, but this is not entirely accurate, but sad nonetheless.

If anyone still checks this blog, which I doubt after three years of inactivity, I cannot provide you with what I revere as the ongoing suspense of my blog. I have no more updates for my then stagnant love life as marriage has obliterated any semblence of what drama that may have entailed. Nor can I entertain the quippy comments about how my life rivaled and often paralleled our fictional friend Ted from "How I Met Your Mother". I suppose I could drone on and on about my video game conquests, books I have read, the construction projects we have done to the house, or even delve into the modifications I have done and plan to do to my car. Alas, I am stuck with writers block, probably due to a three year vacation, which I do not intend to repeat, but I will leave my first returning post at that. God Speed.

It's a storm sewer if he lights a match I feel Sorry for anyone who lights a match wtihin ten yards of it.

2006-12-22T10:11:00.000-06:00

Well, I finally broke down and joined the crackspace phenomenom. I know that I have been less than diligent in keeping up with my posts, but rest assured the life has been far from boring and eventful. I now have double responsibility managing RED Lounge and BLUE, but I love the challenge.

In other news I bought my first snowboard and am planning to go on my first trip in seven years this season. Dont worry, I also bought a helmet. Anyways, The main reason that I posted this entry was to let all who read this BLOG know that I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. And to my closest friends and family I love you all.

Are You Telling Me, That You Built a Time Machine, Out of a Delorean?!

2006-09-01T10:47:00.000-05:00

Well, It's not a Delorean, nor is it a time machine. Some have dubbed it the "astropod" While others have just laughed at it, but I really love my car, and thus far it has been good to me. It is my third car, and if you count my motorcycles, my fifth Honda. These pictures represent the vehicle in its pure stock form. Since I took these pics a week ago, I have changed out the badging, to conform with the Type R spec, added the Type R spoiler, and purchased a new strut and spring kit on Ebay that will lower my car an inch. I have many more plans for the vehicle and will represent these in photo as they come about.

The Following Takes Place Between...

2006-08-29T22:26:00.000-05:00

It's about damn time! For those who were awake for the emmy's this past weekend, federal agent Jack Bauer and all the rest of the cast of Fox's "24" finally got credit for breaking protocal and kickin terrorist ass for the past five years. Kiefer took home best male performance in a drama series and the show picked up best drama.

By the way Jack, Nice pic!

For This Reason Above All, I Have Sent Them You..My Only Son

2006-08-22T08:35:00.000-05:00

I have returned. Amazingly, I am not dead, but I have been extremely busy lately and posting to my blog here was not on the top of my list.

Back in April we put an old and beloved family member to rest. Mr. Miyagi, our cat, who was 15 was euthanized. We all took it harder than we expected, but flash forward 4 months later and my mom and her husband have gotten a little orange tabby, named Pepe.

In other news, when I was previously tuned into this planet I had just left my dead end job downtown to pursue other opportunities at the restaurant. Well a lots happened since then and now I am the new Assistant Manager of Red Lounge and BLUE Sushi Sake and Grill. It is definitely a big change in a lot of ways, but I am happy about it and await the new challenge and responsibility.

During my hiatus, I paid off my credit card debt, discovered E-bay, and rekindled my interest in cars, specifically my own. I have a lot of plans for it in the near future, so stay tuned for some photo representation.

Still with the girl from the last post, I know it's a miracle. However, when you have a relationship that is as laid back and casual/comfortable as ours, it's pretty easy to see why it works so well. Anywho, I gotta go, but rest assured that I will be back sooner than later...

It Has Begun

2006-04-26T14:17:00.000-05:00

If anyone out there reads this and is remotely interested, you might want to know that I quit my job yesterday. Ok, maybe I shouild clarify a bit. I gave notice to my daytime employer, the marketing firm. In a few weeks I will be waiting tables full time at BLUE. It may sound dumb that a college grad is waiting tables and turning down a Senior Account Executive Position at a marketing firm. However, when you are making less than 1k a month without benefits for a year, it starts to wear on you, not to mention the bloody fortune I spend on gas and parking while working downtown. I'm not without drive or ambition though, as there are some future opportunities in the restaurant as well. Stay Tuned.

On another note, I have a girlfriend now. And me, the man who can't shut up about anything, is really at a loss for words about the whole thing. I'm happy and so is she. We compliment each other very well and love to spend as much time together as possible. It's wonderful and I can honestly say that I have never had a relationship that was as easy and as comfortable as this one is. Am I boasting? Yes, so get over it.

You Need to Get Your Joint Worked On MIles

2006-04-17T15:15:00.000-05:00

What a weekend, drinking, golf, the symphony, Easter with the family, and just all around being lazy. I suppose if I could have gone sky diving, I'd be good to go. And in reference to this weekend, my quest to find a woman with reason, accountability and a good sense of humor, has ended abruptly in a most unexpected way. As you may have guessed the highlight of my weekend was spending the majority of it with someone who means a great deal to me and if you find that boring, flat, repetitive or irrelevant, I have this quote to give to you:

"Some of us have
great stories... Pretty stories
that take place at lakes with
boats and friends and noodle
salad. Just not anybody...
But lots of people -- that's
their story -- good times and
noodle salad... And that's what
makes it hard. Not that you had
it bad but being that pissed that
so many had it good."

Watch out Bin Laden, Or We'll Melt You With Our Peace Ray

2006-04-11T12:04:00.000-05:00

I'm an advocate for being good to the environment as much as the next guy, but eco reform and the green movement will take time and unfortunately there are other matters in the world that are more pressing. However, if Al Gore had it his way, we'd all be smoking weed in the streets singing Kumbaya while Al Qaida picked us off one by one from the roof tops. Meanwhile Al Gore is sitting on the other side of the street holding up his vote Al for 2016 campaign poster mumbling hey man you hear something? Yeah, it's the demise of our country that you've spent the last twenty years flushing down the partisan toilet. This film he has coming out, "The inconvenient Truth" is yet another attempt by the democratic party via Michael Moore "esk" one sided documentary film making designed to subdue the American public through fear via the big screen. I'm gonna stop talking now because I'll just end up getting angry. My advice, in any issue facing you or the nation for that matter, take a moment to hear both sides and if they're still partisan locked, do your own research and form your own opinion. That's my two cents.

Hopefully I'll Meet Your Mother

2006-03-30T09:24:00.001-06:00

Today's title probably does not make much sense unless you've seen CBS's new hit show on Monday Night titled "How I met Your Mother". Somehow the creators stumbled on to the lives of myself and my two close friends A.J. and Chris. The three main characters have similar tastes habits and life experiences as we do in frighteningly accurate detail. My character happens to be the main character "Ted". He is the narrator of the show, and tells his story to his children years later of how he met their mother, hence the title. Much like myself, Ted has bad romantic timing, in that he likes girls when they do not like him and vice versa. He loves without fear of being hurt and has one romantic failure after the other much like myself. He, as did I, even found himself stuck in a long distance relationship. They Dont Work, just so you know.

Anyway, here's rooting for the nice guy, the romantic guy, who tries valiantly, but can never quite find her. Here's hoping that both Ted and myself may someday find that one who makes us want to be a better man.

Have Fun Storming The Castle!

2006-03-24T11:46:00.000-06:00

Today is my 25th birthday in case you were interested. If you are keeping track, yes I am an Aries. My life has been very eventful and satisfying up to this point. I can honestly say that I have no regrets and truly am happy with where I am right now and where I seem to be headed. Sure I've made mistakes, but the important thing is that I learned from them.

I don't know what lies just around the corner for me, but I am very excited about what it might be. Rest assured it will be good regardless. Who knows, maybe the Mrs. (whoever that might be) is in my near future. I'll keep you all in the loop of any new developments. Until then, stay tuned Same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel!

Also, there will be a good time had by all at RED Lounge tonight starting at 9PM for those that are interested. Come Back for some good photos.

You Can't Handle the Truth

2006-03-15T10:45:00.000-06:00

I may be speaking to myself here because I know I draw in as much traffic as a Menanite restaurant on Sundays to this here blog. However, with now more than one incident having occurred due to the content herin posted below, I have this to say.

Everything that I write on this blog, as the title implies is random, and therefore, should never be taken personally by anyone unless I mention you by name. Further, I write in this blog as a sort of journal to collect my thoughts and at times even make myself laugh. In other words, do not read into anything on this blog, I don't take it that seriously, so neither should you. Enjoy.

I'm Screwed

2006-03-09T14:43:00.000-06:00

I think I have it figured out. Ever notice how every time you really like someone it doesn't work out? And every time that you are not interested in someone, you have a hard time getting rid of them. Maybe it's just me, but that is the experience that I have had in recent history. Maybe if I trick myself into thinking that I don't like the next woman that comes into my life even if I really do like her, it will create some weird paradox and it will all some how work out....Yep, I think that I will try that.

I Used To Live Here You Know

2006-03-09T14:41:00.000-06:00

Breath, Blood or Urine...No thanks I'm Full

2006-02-21T11:30:00.000-06:00

Went to Coldplay last night. By far the most spectacular show I have ever seen and the fact that I had bitchin seats didn't hurt either. Started the night out right with the BLUE crew at J's house. After some libations and some grub we headed downtown to catch the show. I was pretty buzzed when I got there and the 5 beers I had there only made the situation that much more interesting. Needless to say, I had to call a friend who lives downtown to come pick me up after the show. Ran into the X, her mother and her X while wasted, pretty sure that didn't go well. But all in all I had a blast, cheered, clapped and sang myself hoarse. Truly a night I will never forget whether you believe that or not.

According to my source, the end of the world will be on February 14th, in the year two thousand and sixteen. ...Valentine's Day Bummer

2006-02-14T10:22:00.000-06:00

Last night was great! Food, alcohol, 24, How I Met Your Mother and a hell of a dual in Double Dash. And to quote Dean Martin:

"You Haven't Drunk too much wine if you can still lie on the floor without holding on!"

Got an email this morning from the girl....

I'm dancin...
And Singin....
In...The Rain

Can You Read My Mind?

2006-02-13T13:26:00.000-06:00

I have had a lot on my mind lately and not necessarily about one subject area in particular either. For those that know me well they know that when I talk I get long winded in an attempt to convey the most accurate representation of what I am actually thinking. Anyways, what I am getting at is it would be a lot easier if people could just read my mind. It would save me the embarrassing explanations out of my frequent Freudian slips and the like

No update on the girl situation. After an unpleasant ending to an otherwise pleasant evening, our last encounter / date went well. She asked me to call her when I got home which I did more than once with no answer or return phone call. Whatever, I hate this shit sometimes, more work and worry than it is worth if you ask me. I know that I like her and visa versa, the question is will it work and is the timing right. Who the hell knows....done

You're Money and You Don't Even Know It

2006-02-09T09:21:00.000-06:00

With the last two women that have entered my life romantically I think todays entry title sums me up. Not to drop the ego bomb or anything, but they have both been the kind of girls I always thought of as being out of my league. The problem with that mentality is I turn into a limp noodle in the initial stages unable to strategize and play it cool.

Prime example: Last night I headed up to Roja for some shrimp tacos and Adam met me up there for a beer. We're just sitting there shooting the classics shit and I'm finding myself stuck in the inevitable vortex of uncertainty and second guessing, that is inevitable during the first few weeks of dating someone. Obviously, from my previous entry you all know that there is a new interest in my life. Well, I started asking Adam stupid questions like how often should I call, and is going out more than once a week at first moving too fast? I know that I enjoy all of the time that I spend with her, but I also know that it might be too much. No, I'm not a social retard, but this crap is very delicate.

Unfortunately, there is this fine line in the initial stages of dating as far as the attention one shows the other person in the relationship. Too much attention and you come off as unstable and desperate, too little (even if you're playing hard to get) can be misinterpreted as disinterested, it's a bloody mess if you ask me. Right now my self image resembles Mike from the movie swingers. Don't get me wrong, on the outside I'm a lot smoother, but my internal dialogue is damn near an exact match. Good God, it's 9:30 in the morning and after thinking about all this crap I need a drink. Wish me luck!

Do You Like Apples?....I Got Her Number, How Do You Like Dem Apples?

2006-02-06T08:58:00.000-06:00

21-10 and who cares, Superbowl what's that. I spent the weekend doing many things, but I would have to say that the highlights were the 3 evenings I spent with a girl. Of all the crap I have had to deal with in my personal life in the past four years, my time with her thus far in all aspects can be summed up in one word, "refreshing". No stress, no expectations, and a natural connection that is completely genuine and unique. Although I think that goes without saying when you spend 3 evenings in a row with someone. Anyway, if it is not already obvious, my internal voice is incesantly reminding me not to screw this up. So far being me has done wonders and I will continue to be real and if that wins her over then what more could you ask for.

Good Night and Good Luck

If Adam Calls, Tell Him Sorry, I Had to Go See About a Girl

2006-01-31T08:45:00.001-06:00

Crazy weekend. While I got all Mexed up with Margaritas and prepared to hit the cerebral subconscious pinata, my good buddy Adam was getting ready to board the GGW (Girls Gone Wild) Limo with the crew from Omaha Night Life. I was invited, but as such, I regrettably passed on that one. To be honest I never really wanted to go and knew that I would get a detailed first person's perspective from Adam as soon as he woke up the following day. Sure enough, I got the call, but it was at 4AM which was before he actually went to bed and long after I had. The next night - Sat - he was ready to get rowdy again, but this time I again had other plans. I headed up to Roja and met up with the boys, Tom, JD, and the other Adam. We had some grub and then headed to Red for some libations and little mood music compliments of this Russian D.J. who will remained unnamed due to the sole fact that I don't know it. In classic fashion upon arriving, before I even finished my first beer, I saw a girl across the bar, who I actually used to know, but it had been years. I felt myself being compelled to go over and talk to her and to make a long story short, I ditched the boys and reacquainted myself with a very attractive, compelling and truly amazing woman. So this weekend when Adam will again entice me with sex crazed women, free beer, and a night on the town, with the boys, I'll just say, "Sorry Adam, I gotta go see about a girl."

Due North Miss Tesbaucher, North

2006-01-23T16:35:00.000-06:00

Maybe those global warming hippies had it right? Now nearing the end of January and the lowest forcasted high for the week is 42, that's like a Texas winter and for those of you keeping track, about 700 miles too far south. Not that I am complaining, but if everything is gonna be dead, dormant, and desert sienna brown, we might as well have the hellacious wind blown snow and ice too, after all, it is winter.

Bad Things

2006-01-12T09:29:00.000-06:00

When you came in the air went out.
And every shadow filled up with doubt.
I don't know who you think you are,
But before the night is through,
I wanna do bad things with you.

I'm the kind to sit up in his room.
Heart sick an' eyes filled up with blue.
I don't know what you've done to me,
But I know this much is true:
I wanna do bad things with you.

When you came in the air went out.
And all those shadows there are filled up with doubt.
I don't know who you think you are,
But before the night is through,
I wanna do bad things with you.
I wanna do real bad things with you.
Ow, ooh.

I don't know what you've done to me,
But I know this much is true:
I wanna do bad things with you.
I wanna do real bad things with you.

I'm Real

2006-01-11T10:28:00.000-06:00

When I am older and have a home and some equity I think I will write a book about life, love and my friend Adam. I swear every time I need a funny story or am looking for the most scandolous behavior or rediculous encounter I hear about it from him either from personal or near personal experieince. I think I will title it: "How mankind began and ended with Adam".

Someone very near and dear to me once said that there was a writer hidden inside of me and I am sure that like many things, if I would have pursued it seriously, I probably could have made something of myself doing just that, but for now, the benefit of whatever talent latent in me in regards to writing will remain confined to this Blog. Until then...

This is a pint...It Comes In Pints?

2006-01-03T10:51:00.000-06:00

Ahh yes the joys of shopping after the holidays. I went on a quest to find a single CD yesterday and after striking out at Best Buy and Target I decided to get a bite to eat and a few drinks at Roja. My old friend Hiomara was working the bar and she hooked me up with a couple of free ones and provided some pretty hilarious recaps from the holiday weekend.

....

Saw Munich with Adam on Sunday night, stellar flick highly recommend it, but it is violent so you've been warned.

....

And on a dating note my New Year's Resolution is to stay the Hell away from crazy chicks who I seem to have an uncanny nack for attracting and unfortunately dating. If I had an ad it would read. Good Looking 24 year old with college education seeking a fun attractive woman who can maintain a healthy level of fluctuation of emotion for more than a day, is not a direct threat to my life, uses her real name, is not self destructive, and above all that does not fein semblence of normal social interaction only to unveil the previously mentioned tantalizing traits after we start dating. Also, communication skills highly recommended.

Dogs and Cats Living Together...Mass Histeria!!

2005-12-30T10:11:00.000-06:00

2005 has come and nearly gone and looking back I barely had a chance to realize it was here. A lot has happened in the past year. For starters, I moved back to Omaha from Des Moines, (Thank God!) and switched from a dead end boring ass job in a cubicle to a budding sales position in a new marketing firm downtown. I realized my life purpose (more on that later). Helped film a documentary in L.A. Visited Chicago, L.A. and New York on business all in the same month. Discovered new love and lost it. Broke a few hearts and had mine broke as well. Got drunk with Adam more than once, but am proud to announce that i did not get sick drunk once this year. Oh yeah.

My plans for ringing in the New Year are not as exciting as one might think. I will be with family doing the whole Christmas/New Year package deal. I love my family, but the New Year is one of those times that I would rather be with my friends and in tribute to A.J. getting a hot wet kiss from a girl, but the only kisses I'll be getting this year are from my mother and grandmother. Yay for me! Someone said something about no alcohol this year because of the disfunctional nature of my broken family, but rest assured I'll be flasking it up or maybe I'll just start out wasted. Stay Tuned.

If you hop between my blog and Adam's blog you may encounter cross over, but I too have this to say: Never regret your choices in life because whatever they were and whatever consequence they produced, you made that decision at the time for a reason. I've made some chioces I thought were great and some turned out to be crappy situations later and the opposite has happened as well. Look at Milton from Office Space he was fired didn't get paid and he chose to stay, burned down the building, which some may have considered risky, but now he's on the beach drinking Margaritas with No Salt! And above all never be afraid to and absolutely never regret loving someone, it truly is one of God's greatest gifts. Later..........

The Band Is On The Filed! The Band Is On The Field!

2005-12-29T10:13:00.000-06:00

No it wasn't 1982's Cal vs Stanford, but for God's sake for a second there I thought it was going to be....Exhale..Good job guys.

NU 32 Mich 28

It was?........... Soap.........Poisoning!

2005-12-23T10:31:00.000-06:00

I have nothing to say except Merry Christmas and may all your Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle dreams come true!

Captain Insano Strikes Again

2005-12-22T11:22:00.000-06:00

Many of you who have followed this blog from the beginning or have wasted enough time to catch up by reading the entire thing through just now are probably convinced that I use a variety and quite large amounts of elicit drugs. Sorry to disappoint, but no. See Title..

I literally just write whats on my mind at the time whether I am up, down, happy, pissed, or goofy. It's really not so much a diary as it is a mind dump. I dont talk about sports or news because if anyone wants to read about that they can grab a newspaper or check out an equally relevant website that is not my blog. Most who know me know that I like to talk and over explain myself and there are a lot of reasons for that. I'm really not as crazy as this jamble of randomness and emotion may indicate, far from it in fact. In the end I hope that those who follow me through this find a laugh or an insightful angle into something they may never have thought about before.

Thanks for playing and Merry Christmas!

All Those Things I Can Do, All Those Powers, And I Couldn't Even Save Him

2005-12-20T12:27:00.000-06:00

Well, what an interesting weekend to say the least. An old friend, I haven't seen in years was in town. We hung out drank some beer and after awhile I said tootaloo and proceeded to get wasted on my own. If I would have known that was my only opportunity to see him all weekend I probably would not have left in such haste, but oh well. I think I stopped into 8 bars that night spanning from the Old Market to 156th and Maple.

On Saturday night, I watched an interesting movie to say the least called Somewhere In Time, which thankfully was made better by yes, more alcohol. And then on Sunday as usual I didn't do shit.

Last night I had a movie date with my mom. We saw The Chronicles of Narnia, somewhat of a junior movie, but it was good regardless.

On a completely separate note, I have been getting my ass kicked in the gym lately. Please understand I don't mean some neckless flamer in skin tight pokodot pants is jamming me into a locker or worse. With the guidance of a trainer and his specified workout plan most of the ass kicking has been self inflicted. I just joined Gold's Gym and as part of my new membership I get a free personal trainer. After a few meetings with him, we established a workout to help me meet my fitness goals. I think the last time I did a workout that lasted over an hour where my heart rate remained at 160bpm the whole time was in high school swimming. I can't complain though, my belt fits tighter, my jeans are looser and I'm gaining weight. Six pounds so far. For you clueless individuals out there who may be thinking that I just contradicted myself, getting slimmer in the waist while gaining wait is called building lean muscle mass.

Promise

2005-12-15T09:01:00.000-06:00

"They could be a great people
They wish to be,
They only lack the light to show the way,
For this reason above all,
Their capacity for good,
I have sent them you,
My only son..."

LATELY

2005-12-14T14:51:00.000-06:00

That the sky would lift
That I'd find my place
That I'd see your face in the door
And the sun would glint
An a time well spent
An a time that ain't no more

Taste the broken hearts
In the vacant lots
See the fruit that rots on the trees
Try to turn my head
Leave it all for dead
But it's in my mind always

Honey lately I've been way down
A load on my mind
Honey lately I've been way down
Load on my mind

Someone tell me where did it go
Darling I'm damned if i know
I seen that look in your eye
No-one ever gave it a chance
I could have said in advance
You saw it all at a glance
And goodbye

Drag a salted kiss
From this cup of bliss
Watch a new lie twist on the breeze

You can paint it red
Leave it all for dead
But it's in my head always

Honey lately I've been way down
A load on my mind
Honey lately I've been way down
Load on my mind

Someone tell me where did it go
Darling I'm damned if i know
Iseen that look in your eye
No-one ever gave it a chance
I could have said in advance
You saw it all at a glance
And goodbye

Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye

Honey lately i've been way down
Honey lately i've been way down
Honey lately i've been way down
Honey lately i've been way down
Lately
Lately

by:David Gray

Blinded By Hidden Immaturity

2005-12-08T17:00:00.000-06:00

I am a firm believer in WIP or "Work In Progress" Meaning I am always open to new things whether they be insights, ideas, or perspectives. I am always willing to admit defeat and begrudgingly will in time accept most if not all criticism that comes my way, even if it means that I am wrong. I was recently having an in depth conversation with my cousin and he pointed out some important things that helped me come up with an entertaining and poignant analogy. We were discussing our history of relationships and the frustrations of bad timing and immaturity in our choices. Meaning the people we chose had something wrong with them that invariably would either improve over time and our time with them was not right. It really ends up being sad though because normally we really want to be with that person and feel bad that the only reason that it won't work is because of some unresolved conflict or issue inside that person that we can do nothing to encourage resolution with. This of course is usually unknown to us and we are even worse blinded by an abnormally large amount of emotional attatchment as well and here is where the analogy comes in.

Picture in your mind the atari game "frogger". When you are single it's like the beginning of each level. There you are on the side of the road where you can see everything. You can see all the vehicles wizzing by and know the exact timing and speed of their every move. You know where the alligators are lurking and what logs you can jump on and when they will appear. Enter relationship. Once you start dating and get emotionally involved you become blinded. This is when you jump into traffic and the only thing you can see is the next leap and the only thing you can really lock onto is the next truck or log that is about to squash you. Tyhe big picture and your ability to deduce, logically strategize and evaluate situations is gone. It's quite sad really.

Friends Don't Let Friends Drive Drunk, But They Do If They're Also Plastered

2005-12-01T12:05:00.000-06:00

Being in touch with reality and having clarity in truth can be a very difficult thing to handle. Given that, it is obvious why so many people turn to the bottle to cope with their problems. If you hit the bews hard enough you can even forget who you are and reality and clarity quickly become two things long forgotten.

I just went through something really shitty and the frustrating part is that with the facts on the table it still makes no sense. I have shared the scenario with many and their outside perspectives always come up with the same conclusion which is confusion. Do I wish reality were different, of course, but the interesting thing is that while most in my position would have started drinking immediately, I have barely touched the stuff. Maybe it's because I am so dumbfounded that I desire clarity and the ability to deduce. I keep convincing myself that with enough analyzing their just might be an answer, something that alcohol would never clarify.

The amazing part is that quite honestly, while I do enjoy a good drink, forcing sobriety and coping through thought and understanding has helped me move forward more quickly than I possibly could have imagined. Good friends with a lot of support hasn't hurt either, but you have to remember that life is too short to stall out on one speed bump. Not to mention I am not a quitter who likes to sit and sulk. Like I always say roll with the punches and make the most out of what you have. Everything happens for a reason, the problem is you often don't know what that is, you just have to believe it.

...

2005-11-28T04:01:00.000-06:00

Have you ever had one of those dreams that you swear was real, and just before the best part you wake up and realize that it was just your imagination playing tricks on you? Have you ever wished that after waking you could rip yourself from consciousness and return to that dream because it is far better than reality? The only part of my life I care to think of as reality now is just a dream. A dream that I keep returning to and each time that I stir myself from my few moments of solace and rest these lonely hours, I am reminded of the harshness and truth of a reality I can't even comprehend. I wish for sleep and never find it. If I did I would wish for no dreams and to never wake.

What's worse is that my dreams are so vivid. I can smell you, I see the glimmer in your eye when you look at me that I know is still inside. How can love so strong and so recent disappear? You say there was no void in my absence? Tell me now that there is no void in your life because then I would know that the one that I once knew is truly gone. You have judged me for crimes and problems I have not yet committed or created and worse been left behind with the assumption that I would not have the capacity to solve them had I even been given a real chance to prove myself? What wrong in life have I committed that I deserve this fate? I am far less the man I was before, left only to a shell of my previous existence.

You are that which I have lost, and I am that which you have forgotten. My only wish was for a second chance, one that was denied before it ever began and for your sake that I am truly sorry was never able to be realized. I will remain until such time that I have the will to move on, but I will never give up.

Am I Boring You?

2005-11-17T09:25:00.000-06:00

I know that most often when something is bothering me regardless if another is involved I tend to have a long drawn out interior dialogue. I think that I do this because I like to see things from another's perspective. This has made many things hard for me, like ignoring a homeless person on the street or breaking up with a significant other regardless of how good my reasons were. I even have a hard time yelling or getting angry with others usually because I can see it from their end and know that the issue is often not personal. Most think I'm nuts. It does however, give me the reputation of having a big heart and a cool temper, but honestly the interior stress this causes will drive you mad. If it wasn't for the remorse and guilt that I would otherwise feel, I'd be all over these issues like white on rice. I'd be screaming into the face of all those that have stepped on me, refuse to respect me or my opinions for that matter or made me feel unimportant to further their own cause. Of course that also makes little sense because I'm a damn non confrontational. Now that's a great trait, let's get pissed off, but instead of venting our frustrations at the appropriate moment, let's internalize them instead and make it worse!

OK, I'll just set the building on fire

2005-11-04T14:17:00.000-06:00

Yes, here we all are. After years of hard work, papers, speeches, midterms, finals, psycho professors, costly tuition and over priced books and oogles of tax payer's dollars later (for those who went to state universities) this is what we have to show for it. A desk, maybe even a cubicle and for those lucky few, an office! Ah yes, workin for the man (or woman) is glory and triumph in its finest. How many people went up in front of their first grade classroom and said "I want to be a benefits specialist when I grow up" or "I wanna be a work comp claims processor", or 'I'm gonna be a dispatcher!" or even, "My dream is to become a glorified secretary who is only acknowledged as an office assistant A.K.A. Everyone's Bitch", that's right I said it.

Am I making fun of anyone, absolutely not. My first job outside of college, was actually one of those previously mentioned and friends of mine who also have professional degrees were or are the others. In the end, until we follow the gradual promotion pipeline, suck major ass, or both we are all just Milton's running around wondering where our paycheck is and what shoddy task we will be assigned next. Oh, where are the matches when you need them!!

I Got a Wallet!

2005-10-24T10:31:00.000-05:00

Everyone else is doing it so here are somethigs you might not know about me:

1. I have been to three continents and 5 countries other than the U.S. obviously, but within the states I have been to 30 of them.
2. My middle name is Phillip
3. I survived a motorcycle accident in which my bike was totaled and all I had were some cuts and bruises.
4. I have recently realized that subconciously I am attracted to blondes, but like red heads as well, they tend to be wild and fun.
5. The only pro sport I have ever seen in person is baseball, which I don't even like.
6. I have been to five Husker games and they lost three of them.
7. Since I turned 16, I have driven over 115,000 miles and have owned 5 vehicles.
8. I am currently working at job #16
9. I ran the 100 meter dash in 10.9 seconds and swam the 50yd free in 22.00 seconds as a Junior in high school.
10. If I could have a super power, it would be the ability to fly.
11. If I could have a magical ability, it would be to use the force.
12. The fastest I have driven was 150mph and I did it twice, once on Dodge St. and once on I-80.
13. I've never snorted, injected, smoked or swallowed an illegal substance. Really!
14. I am the oldest of 24 cousins on both sides of my family.
15. I can read Japanese, but have very little idea of what is means.

"I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams."

2005-10-21T08:30:00.000-05:00

"I find I am so excited I can barely
sit still or hold a thought in my
head. I think it is the excitement
only a free man can feel, a free
man at the start of a long journey
whose conclusion is uncertain..."

It's Czechoslovakia, it's like going into Wisconsin!!

2005-10-19T09:33:00.000-05:00

Things are tricky at times and with age I have learned to forgive and forget. In the process I have really learned to appreciate the things in life that matter the most like family and friends. When my parents got divorced and my mother began immediately conversing with a man from another country, it was infuriating. Years have gone by and now that they are married he has never been fully accepted into our family, which is somewhat sad, yet to be expected give how long my parents were married. I would not be telling the truth if I said I did not do my part to push my mother away and reject her new husband, who by the way is six years my senior. Not that I am proud of that at all, it was wrong. Now things are a little rough between them, I feel because they rushed into things without really getting to know each other, but who knows.

The thing about it is, I really care about my mom and our family has been through enough in the last few years and I hate to see her sad. Not to mention I am far from anxious to start supporting one of my own parents emotionally again, that is a role no child should ever take on. I guess feeling this way I know that I am a good son and have come full circle from wanting her to be miserable to wanting nothing more than for her to be happy.

Hey Sanka,...Ya Dead Mahn?

2005-10-14T10:00:00.000-05:00

Well it has been awhile hasn't it. And yes ladies and gentleman it is time for another rant. Let's talk about smoking shall we.

Let's light something on fire and stick it in our mouths. Hmm good and oh yeah did I mention you are burning at least 10 chemicals that are also found in car exhaust. It makes your teeth yellow, causes cancer, smells bad, makes your breath stink, makes your clothes dirty and smelly. It's not sexy or atttractive and for God sakes it's fucking rude to do it in public unless you ask everyone at the establishment you are at if it is ok you blow shit into the air that they breathe. And no it's not your right it is a priviledge and can and will be revoked....bitch.

Green Light Go, Red Light Stop, Yellow Light, Go Very Fast

2005-10-05T09:50:00.000-05:00

I thought I would Blog today and share a little quip from C.S. Lewis, a talented author and close friend of my favorite author J.R. Tolkein (author of "The Hobbit" and "The Lord of the Rings")

Forgiving Versus Excusing

"I find that when I think I am asking God to forgive me I am often in reality (unless I watch myself very carefully) asking Him to do something quite different. I am asking HIm not to forgive me but to excuse me. But there is all the difference in the world between forgiving and excusing. Forgiveness says "Yes, you have done this thing, but I accept your apology; I will never hold it against you and everything between us to will be exactly as it was before." But excusing says "I see that you couldn't help it or didn't mean it; you weren't really to blame." If one was not really to blame then there is nothing to forgive. In that sense forgiveness and excusing are almost opposites. Of course, in dozens of cases, either between God and man, or between one man and another, there may be a mixture of the two. Part of what seemed at first to be the sins turns out to be really nobody's fault and is excused; the bit that is left over is forgiven. ....But the trouble is that what we call "asking God's forgiveness" very often really consists in askng Gode to accept our excuses. What leads us into this mistake is the fact that there usually is some amount of excuse, some "extenuating circumstances." We are so very anxious to point these out to God (and to ourselves) that we are apt to forget the really important thing; that is, the bit left over, the bit which the excuses don't cover, the bit which is inexcuseable but not, thank God, unforgiveable. And if we forget this, we shall go away imagining that we have repented and been forgiven when all that has really happened is that we have satisfied ourselves with our own excuses. They may be very bad excuses; we are all too easily satisfied about ourselves."

-from "On Forgiveness" (The Weight of Glory)

Weird Science

2005-10-04T14:17:00.000-05:00

For those of you who slept through physics there is a law of nature discovered by our old friend Newton that states for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This suddenly dawned on me in response to recent events. Long ago a string of things happened that at the time did not make sense and unfortunately were not all good or at least I lacked the perspective and forsight to understand their purpose. All I know is that through difficulty, many mistakes and a lot of growing up and maturing my life has come full circle and many of those things that went awry at a particularly transitional time in my life have worked out in wonderful ways that I would never have seen as possible. For the first time in years I truly consider myself lucky to be alive and to have what I have been blessed to receive. I could not be happier and rest assured the future is looking bright.

Besides the fact that everything is great, this change has also allowed me to look back and truly appreciate the support structure that I have in my friends and family. Without knowing what was to come they were there when I needed them and for that I owe them much.

Protego!

2005-09-30T09:16:00.000-05:00

Yes yes, little did you know that today while exploring my blog, you would be going home with my entire collected works.

Yes today marks 48 days until the fourth installment of the Harry Potter series, "The Goblet Of Fire" hits theatres. In my opinion this book is the best of the six that are currently in print. This story is loaded with drama and action and has a darker element that skims most of the juvenile feel that still resides from the beginning of the saga. You will not be disappointed with this movie which will seem more like a halloween story than another happy go lucky Harry Potter. Rest assured "Dark and Difficult Times Lie Ahead" for young Harry Potter.

Feeling Groovy

2005-09-28T09:47:00.000-05:00

Well for all of you who are interested, the mayor actually showed up for work today and for nothing less than free coffee and donuts. For God's sake hasn't the man deprived this city enough, now he's taking the one thing we have left. Did anyone really vote for this guy?

In case you were wondering, today at 9:30 renovations began at 19th and Douglas to remodel the courtyard area of the Continental Building soon to be called the Douglas building. According to the architechs and designers involved, the building will maintain it's 60's theme, thus reflecting and paying tribute to the era that it was built. Yes, it's the stuff Brady Bunch and Partridge Family block parties were all about.

You've been the only thing that's right... In all I've done

2005-09-26T10:24:00.000-05:00

A fulfilling fun filled weekend plagued by vulnerability and lack of sleep, but a memorable one at that. Friday, I did nothing and slept late Sat morning, it was glorious. Saturday afternoon was Dodgeball, after all, I have to support my friends. After that it was beer then games and beer at Dave and Busters. Sunday was equally uneventful and alas the weekend is over yet again.

Now that my extremely exciting account of the weekend is over let's get down to topic.

There are moments in life where there is a window of seizeable opportunity, that if not taken, you are forced to look back at a forgone chance. Often there is risk involved, but one thing that I have learned over the years, is that risk is way better than regret no matter how scary it may seem at the time. Especially if the risk is telling someone that you love them...

I can't even begin to explain to anyone the degree and amount of change that has happened in my life in the last year. Some are remotely aware and have a general idea, but let me put it this way. Right now I couldn't be happier, my perspective is completely illuminated for the first time and excitement is building within me in anticipation of what could be and it's...well let's just say... wonderful.

Hatch Chili Anyone?

2005-09-23T10:32:00.000-05:00

Tonight marks the beginning of the main event, dual of the Legacy powerhouses on West Center. In one corner, Roja Mexican Grill and in the other Upstream Brewery. Hatch Chili Festival meets Octoberfest. There will be beer, there will be food and good times had by all.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, coincidence, I think not.

2005-09-22T12:04:00.000-05:00

After a brief conversation about beer with one of my friends last night, I thought that I would rant about my thoughts on the wonderful beverage known as brew.

First and foremost, for all of you self proclaimed beer lovers out there who have only ever tasted Bud Light and swear by its frothy goodness. Congratulations you are officially a victim of bad taste buds and the influential media power and proliferation of a corporate beer conglomerate known as Anheiser Busch. I'm sorry but that is the way it is and you may now leave the room because I am not talking to you. By the way the next thing out of your mouth better be in the presence of others like you at the Bud Light Anonymous group and it should probably be something like "Hi, my name is... and I drink Bud Light"

Moving on. Now, what really irks me is when people tell me they love beer or pretend they know everything about it, or that they have a lot of experience with different types. Well just for the record you are not going to earn any points if you list off Light, Ultra Light, and Heavy as the three strata of beer.... No. We need to be thinking along the lines of pilsner, ale, lager, stout, porter. Work with me here.

Oh and if you are one of those who does not like beer...let me guess you've had one of the following, Miller Lite, Bud Light, Coors Light or worse, but we don't mention those in public and whoever forced that down your throat deserves to be flogged. Now there are those who just don't like beer and that's fine, but don't sit there and tell me that you can drink that black shit in the morning and can't choke down a beer. And while we are on the subject, let's compare the two. Coffee is made from beans that are actually berries that you bake, then take the kernel from the inside, smash it into smithereens and take the dirt like remnant and poor hot water over it. Mmm sounds good doesn't it. Coffee contains caffeine which let's face it is the poor mans crack. It accelerates your heart rate, gives you the shakes and if you come off it you get headaches. WTF, whose idea was it to use this crap as a breakfast replacement anyway?

Now let's look at beer. Beer can be made with a variety of substances, but requires a few things at minimum. Usually hops for flavor, grain, yeast and water. Now, a multitude of steps, additions and brew time modifications can be made here to change color, alcohol content and flavor, but to make a long story short there are endless possibilities on what the final product will be. It's a science and takes days to produce. There is no such thing as instant beer. And in comparison to Coffee, beer has a calming effect on the body. It relaxes the mind, reduces stress and makes for a thumping good time at the bowling alley among other places. It pairs well with food, unlike coffee which only goes well with dessert, but beer does that too.

Some may say that beer is not good for you and that in my opinion is a misnomer. Drinking beer excessively along with a bad diet and minimal activity will let's face it, make you fat. However, if you can avoid the common foods associated with beer like chips, pizza and wings you will probably be ok. And as a general rule of thumb beer contains between 100 and 200 calories per bottle which is roughly the same as a soda pop. Now when was the last time you tossed back 6-10 soda pops and waited for the six pack ab fairy to appear? That's what I thought, so drink in moderation because most things are ok in moderation, beer included.

Now something that you may not know is that beer actually does have some healthful properties. The darker the beer the better. Darker beers are usually less filtered and therefore have higher concentrations of fiber, flavanoids and B vitamins. Beer in general also contains minimal amounts of protein. Not to mention that the alcohol itself helps moderate cholesterol levels in the blood. Now it's easy to see why one of the founding fathers of this nation, the man that discovered electricity to boot, said this about beer. "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Well said Ben!

So next time you find yourself belly up to the mahogany and the cute bartender asks what will it be. When your virgin eyes scan the expanse of the mirror backed tap wall, take the time to look past the old staple and try something new. You might surprise yourself.

Scotch Ale....Yes Have Some

2005-09-21T15:08:00.000-05:00

I am looking forward to participating in a ritual I have neglected for some time. Yes, I am referring to $2 pint night at The Upstream Brewery where Brad, A.J. and Chris among others wash their stress away in great hand crafted midwestern goodness. My favorite is the Dundee Scotch Ale, and newbies beware, these aren't your 3.5% alcohol Bud Lights this is 5 and 6% beer. It's a little harsh and maybe manish is the word some would use. I prefer tasty and functional, but in the words of Samuel L. Jackson.. "it'll getchya drunk!"

Wise Words Gandalf...Wise Words

2005-09-20T10:34:00.000-05:00

I spent last night consoling a friend who is on the verge of a personal loss and that is never a desirable position to be in. First of all, it is hard to see a friend that you care about in so much pain and even worse feeling and knowing that there is not much you can do about it. It's not that I don't understand, because I do. It's not that I don't care, because no one cares more than I do, I just hope that the few hours of solace I tried to give made a difference.

I also know what it feels like to be helpless and frustrated when nothing goes your way and it all seems to be careening out of control. I understand that feeling of desperation and know all too well the temptation to give up and abandon all that makes you unique. I also know that in those weaker moments in life it is ourselves who are hardest on us. It is our own judgment that is passed on our own actions, decisions and thoughts that is so critical and unforgiving. Perseverance in a time like this in its simplest form, no matter how glamorous is all that those around you will see, and getting through it in any way is what makes the ones you care about so proud of the person you are.

I often refer to the following quote, so often I feel that those I share this with will assume I view my life as a movie and solving all problems is as simple as reciting a line from a film. Well I don't think that and no it is not that simple, however, this proverb helped me through some very hard times and I hope that by sharing it, I can offer the same comfort to others that it brought to me.

..."I wish none of this had happened."

"So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what
to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world besides the will of evil.... And that is an encouraging thought."

Things can happen for reasons that you don't understand and often don't agree with, trust me I know. It is important to realize that the ultimate purpose of hardship is not to crush your will, and no matter what happens or how craptacular it may seem, things will get better, just hang in there.

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

2005-09-19T09:53:00.000-05:00

A good friend of mine, reminded me of something very important this weekend...patience. Sometimes the best thing you can do is wait.....

That's all I have to say about that.

Go Sell Crazy Some Place Else...We're All Stocked Up Here

2005-09-16T11:59:00.000-05:00

As I am a random individual, I wanted to spend today's blog entry giving tribute to one of the most insane and brilliant actors of all time. Jack Nicholson, one of the most quoted and memorable character actors in recent film history, from crazy in The Shining, to nuts but unforgettable in Batman, to absolutely hilarious in As Good as it Gets, Jack is awesome. He is not afraid to take risky roles and never fails to save an otherwise mediocre film. Ageless and full of energy which is evident in his public displays of frustration on center court at the Staples Center during Laker games, what a guy. Here's to the man behind the glasses, Jack.

Far East Adventure Far from Forgotten Five Years Later

2005-09-15T10:45:00.000-05:00

Yes, for those of you who know, five years ago today my friend Brett and I embarked on a wonderous journey, and neither of us were ever the same nor will we ever forget it. Today is five years to the day that Brett and I went to Japan or Nihon to the locals. What food, what culture, what a sight to see from downtown views right out of a sci fi movie to picture perfect views in the wilderness, Japan is a country to behold, respect, and enjoy. Unfamiliar smells, wild hair, crouded streets in a city that truly never sleeps.

We made a lot of friends there from every hemisphere on earth. It's ironic, even though we were taking the equivalent of 21 credit hours, half of which was in Japanese, we had a blast and rarely felt as if we were really going to school at the time. This was truly something I am lucky I had the pleasure to experience.

Where do these stairs go?...They go up!

2005-09-14T09:25:00.000-05:00

Last night I had a smashing time at work and capped off the evening with a three rounds of shots of my old friend Jim with my friend Jimmy. That's right Jim Beam shots my friends. They say Jim makes you mean but I feel that as long as you share it you'll be just fine. Nothing else to say so I will go now.

If you want something bigger I could inflate the couch

2005-09-13T09:04:00.000-05:00

So my mother in her infinite wisdom had asked that I install a new ceiling fan this weekend, which is not necessarily a simple job unless you are an electrician or have significant experience. Needless to say I managed to take off the old one without electrocuting myself, but decided to wait on the new one until she returned to make sure it was set at the right height etc.. Well, yesterday, she decided to do it herself and after major frustration, trial, and error, she got it wired and installed herself. Bravo. The problem with that was my mom had new carpet laid yesterday and the reason for installing the fan in a hurry was to give the carpet guys sufficient light to work with. Now that would be fine if my mom's final task would not have been to paint the ceiling.

Now, I think of myself as a logical individual and this is not logical. Nature has a natural order to things and so does common sense...this is neither. The correct, most efficient and quickest way to do all this would be to remove the old ceiling fan and before carpet is laid paint the ceiling. That way there are no obstacles to paint around and no worries about dripping paint on the sub floor. OK I am done bitching for the day I got it done and she's happy.

Uhh... Hmm... yah, I need a hobby

2005-09-12T09:53:00.000-05:00

The General of Electric Posts a Toast

2005-09-12T09:31:00.000-05:00

Went cosmic bowling on Friday and had a blast. After 2 pitchers of beer I was feeling pretty good too. Only bowled under 100 once in four rounds, but that was because I was trying a bunch of trick shots and stuff. I mean really, how much could two pitchers affect my bowling ability? So three days later, my forearm is still sore and the left side of my ass is really sore.

"It's all tingly and shit!"

Congrats to Adam for meeting yet another one, good luck with that, hey maybe you could see if she wants to jello wrestle?

...
And randomly, I just wanted to send a shout out to my friends, thanks for being there, you know who you are. Aloha

On the Corner of my Mind

2005-09-07T08:43:00.000-05:00

At the end of high school I was a young man of absentminded ignorance pushed by a jet engine fueled with racing grade hormone fuel. For those ladies out there who have often sat perplexed as to the direction and motivation of the teenage male psyche, think of it this way. Take the innocent body of a young boy, blindfold him and strap him to the nose of a bullet train. Then send it on a downhill stretch of track straight into a spring valley pollinated with the sweet perfume of sexual temptation so strong it is matched only by the size of his appetite. Yet we are expected to magically undo these bonds, jump off this speeding train and magically float down like some angel and land in the meadow of contentment where we are devoted moral men who think of nothing, but our sweet women. Well that’s fine and dandy, but I would love to meet the man who jumped off that train and didn’t trample a few flowers in that meadow and break a few bones when he made the jump.

I made the jump, but have spent the last five years recovering and struggling relentlessly to find my way back. It’s a lot like hiking a trail and using foliage as a marker, then trying to find that exact spot 20 years later. You knew you were somewhere in that area when you were going the right way, but now nothing is familiar.

Runnin Down a Dream

2005-08-27T20:29:00.000-05:00

Started day one of the vacation today and after 640 miles man are my legs tired. Beautiful country here, right out of a MGD commercial.

As we passed through DSM (Des Moines) we stopped at the ever eclectic Gong Fu Tea Shop where my friends Mike and Rusty are still going strong and doing their thing. A lot can be learned from them on running a successful business in relatively new but quickly booming market of loose leaf tea sales. Anyway, if you are ever going through Des Moines you should stop in, you won't be disappointed unless they are closed.

Well after waking up at 4AM this morning to drive and still being up at 10 I am a little punchy and sort of sleep typing (new word) and in Mike Scrabble new words garner a quadruple word score. Gotta go

Gunga La Gunga

2005-08-26T15:49:00.000-05:00

My own personal belief is that no one should have to clean up anyone else's mess. Sure knock yourself out if it fits your fancy, but don't expect me to do it. This also translates to no one should have to pay for mistakes that others made, but that would go against the inbalance between equtiy and real life. I think what I am getting to the core of here is that I consider myself a "nice guy", and when it comes to us nice guys we finish last every frickin time especially when it comes to ladies.

I mean if fate has it right, I am bound to end up marrying some poor soul who got it wrong the first time. Because God for bid it that any self respecting woman would go after a clean cut nice guy the first time around. After being bloodied up by her former husband my likely wife will realize that there is such a thing as a man who treats a lady with respect and that there is a valid reason to trust the right man. I'll probably end up with two kids that aren't mine and an ever present background deadbeat dad that I and the future wife are constantly battling for money and to stay away from our dog or something like that. All because somewhere some how the estrogen hormone put some bad instinct into so many women that says ya know the beatings will stop and ya know the harder he hits you, the more he loves you, and maybe all those movies and stories about men bringing flowers and being honest was just romantic hollywood bull.

What else do I have to do to prove myself?

I give up.

There is one firearm for every 12 people in the world, the question is how do we arm the other 11?

2005-08-25T09:36:00.000-05:00

So we are sending more troops 1500ish at last count to provide more protection for Iraq during their elections/constitutional drafting. I am not going to get into any politics here because I dont want to have to take the time to read all of the Bull Shit comments from both sides of the uninfomed and uneducated. Sure I have my own opinions, but I will leave them at that. God Speed boys and girls and don't forget..he who must not be named is still out there..

2005-08-24T12:59:00.000-05:00

What Time is it?

2005-08-23T08:53:00.000-05:00

Well, I am sitting here at the car dealership hoping that this time around they can figure out what the hell is making the noise in my suspenion. Meanwhile I am stranded without a car and all I want to do is sleep. Well, I was hoping to keep this one short, so have a nice day all and don't let the gas prices nip you in the tail.

I've lost my balls

2005-08-22T09:26:00.000-05:00

Now, before I get into the details of a fun filled weekend I would have to say that a bar brawl was not in the agenda (see Adam's Blog), but I came close to ripping some old lady a new asshole. In case you don't know me, I am an easy going kinda guy and I really don't get reved up too easily even if you try. So after work on Friday I was getting ready to meet someone for dinner and while sitting in a stall in the parking lot inside of my car minding my own business an old lady in her caprice comes rolling up right next to me. No big deal, but I really like my car and am pretty uneasy to let anyone park too close let alone some old lady in a big car. It's not a disease or stale urine smell that I am worried about, but more of a, I like the smooth contours of my doors and the paint job that is relatively rust and scratch free. Am I a little shallow and a bit anal, maybe, but the thing isn't even paid for and it's really the only expensive thing in my possession. Well to shorten it up the fucking bitch kicks her door open right into my car so I get out and make eye contact waiting for her to say excuse me and allow the both of us to assess the damage and see if it will be an insurance issue. This is the best part. She looks me in the eye smiles and in silence goes about her merry way....WTF!!!! I stared after her in utter bewilderment and in uncontrolled rage left her with the mark of zorro on her left rear passenger door. Now, for those of you reading who are now thinking that I am some sort of ass let me assure you that while I am not excusing my actions, that kind of behavior is not like me at all. However, I was mad and acted out of anger, but damn it felt good.
Now, the original plan was to go miniature golfing, but the rain made for a good excuse to get my ass in gear and watch wedding crashers. Good movie, absolutely hilarious and completely quotable. I highly recommend it, and if you sexually comfortqable with your significant other than it's not a bad date movie either.
Now onto the lost my balls subject. I had a golf lesson on Sat and it went rather well, I really have no idea what I am doing so it was a good starting point. I hit a steady stream of balls during and after the lesson for about 2 hours and I estimate that I hit around a hundred or so. I wore through my already very used glove and thus got a blister. Next day rolls around and my boss and buddy I work with wanted me to go golfing...sure why not. So after nine holes I am nearly bleeding and have very little skin left. Add that to the fact that I have a new swing thanks to the golf lesson, we are playing narrow holes with loads of hazards, OB, trees, and water, I lost a record 16 balls in 18 holes. God I suck. I mean at least in hockey, which I don't play by the way, there is a wall that takes any errant shot and sticks it right back into play automatically. I mean, it really is the poor mans golf with physical contact thrown in the mix to take away the frustration rather than taking it out on the club or some poor patch of bushes or tall grass. Well, it is time to work so I bid you good bye.

Welcome Wagon

2005-08-19T15:54:00.000-05:00

Is it ironic that a strom is brewing the night I create my blog? Not likely.. It is more of an ode to countless rip roaring times with the boys and girls of Nebraska who I have spent most of my days since the crawl. If you are expecting me to delve into the scandalism and sociocratic crap that is bar hoppin for ass then you might have to wait for me to get drunk and recap on some random binge from college, so until then...use your imagination.