Monday, October 24, 2005

I Got a Wallet!

Everyone else is doing it so here are somethigs you might not know about me:

1. I have been to three continents and 5 countries other than the U.S. obviously, but within the states I have been to 30 of them.
2. My middle name is Phillip
3. I survived a motorcycle accident in which my bike was totaled and all I had were some cuts and bruises.
4. I have recently realized that subconciously I am attracted to blondes, but like red heads as well, they tend to be wild and fun.
5. The only pro sport I have ever seen in person is baseball, which I don't even like.
6. I have been to five Husker games and they lost three of them.
7. Since I turned 16, I have driven over 115,000 miles and have owned 5 vehicles.
8. I am currently working at job #16
9. I ran the 100 meter dash in 10.9 seconds and swam the 50yd free in 22.00 seconds as a Junior in high school.
10. If I could have a super power, it would be the ability to fly.
11. If I could have a magical ability, it would be to use the force.
12. The fastest I have driven was 150mph and I did it twice, once on Dodge St. and once on I-80.
13. I've never snorted, injected, smoked or swallowed an illegal substance. Really!
14. I am the oldest of 24 cousins on both sides of my family.
15. I can read Japanese, but have very little idea of what is means.

Friday, October 21, 2005

"I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams."

"I find I am so excited I can barely
sit still or hold a thought in my
head. I think it is the excitement
only a free man can feel, a free
man at the start of a long journey
whose conclusion is uncertain..."

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

It's Czechoslovakia, it's like going into Wisconsin!!

Things are tricky at times and with age I have learned to forgive and forget. In the process I have really learned to appreciate the things in life that matter the most like family and friends. When my parents got divorced and my mother began immediately conversing with a man from another country, it was infuriating. Years have gone by and now that they are married he has never been fully accepted into our family, which is somewhat sad, yet to be expected give how long my parents were married. I would not be telling the truth if I said I did not do my part to push my mother away and reject her new husband, who by the way is six years my senior. Not that I am proud of that at all, it was wrong. Now things are a little rough between them, I feel because they rushed into things without really getting to know each other, but who knows.

The thing about it is, I really care about my mom and our family has been through enough in the last few years and I hate to see her sad. Not to mention I am far from anxious to start supporting one of my own parents emotionally again, that is a role no child should ever take on. I guess feeling this way I know that I am a good son and have come full circle from wanting her to be miserable to wanting nothing more than for her to be happy.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Hey Sanka,...Ya Dead Mahn?

Well it has been awhile hasn't it. And yes ladies and gentleman it is time for another rant. Let's talk about smoking shall we.

Let's light something on fire and stick it in our mouths. Hmm good and oh yeah did I mention you are burning at least 10 chemicals that are also found in car exhaust. It makes your teeth yellow, causes cancer, smells bad, makes your breath stink, makes your clothes dirty and smelly. It's not sexy or atttractive and for God sakes it's fucking rude to do it in public unless you ask everyone at the establishment you are at if it is ok you blow shit into the air that they breathe. And no it's not your right it is a priviledge and can and will be revoked....bitch.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Green Light Go, Red Light Stop, Yellow Light, Go Very Fast

I thought I would Blog today and share a little quip from C.S. Lewis, a talented author and close friend of my favorite author J.R. Tolkein (author of "The Hobbit" and "The Lord of the Rings")

Forgiving Versus Excusing

"I find that when I think I am asking God to forgive me I am often in reality (unless I watch myself very carefully) asking Him to do something quite different. I am asking HIm not to forgive me but to excuse me. But there is all the difference in the world between forgiving and excusing. Forgiveness says "Yes, you have done this thing, but I accept your apology; I will never hold it against you and everything between us to will be exactly as it was before." But excusing says "I see that you couldn't help it or didn't mean it; you weren't really to blame." If one was not really to blame then there is nothing to forgive. In that sense forgiveness and excusing are almost opposites. Of course, in dozens of cases, either between God and man, or between one man and another, there may be a mixture of the two. Part of what seemed at first to be the sins turns out to be really nobody's fault and is excused; the bit that is left over is forgiven. ....But the trouble is that what we call "asking God's forgiveness" very often really consists in askng Gode to accept our excuses. What leads us into this mistake is the fact that there usually is some amount of excuse, some "extenuating circumstances." We are so very anxious to point these out to God (and to ourselves) that we are apt to forget the really important thing; that is, the bit left over, the bit which the excuses don't cover, the bit which is inexcuseable but not, thank God, unforgiveable. And if we forget this, we shall go away imagining that we have repented and been forgiven when all that has really happened is that we have satisfied ourselves with our own excuses. They may be very bad excuses; we are all too easily satisfied about ourselves."

-from "On Forgiveness" (The Weight of Glory)

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Weird Science

For those of you who slept through physics there is a law of nature discovered by our old friend Newton that states for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This suddenly dawned on me in response to recent events. Long ago a string of things happened that at the time did not make sense and unfortunately were not all good or at least I lacked the perspective and forsight to understand their purpose. All I know is that through difficulty, many mistakes and a lot of growing up and maturing my life has come full circle and many of those things that went awry at a particularly transitional time in my life have worked out in wonderful ways that I would never have seen as possible. For the first time in years I truly consider myself lucky to be alive and to have what I have been blessed to receive. I could not be happier and rest assured the future is looking bright.

Besides the fact that everything is great, this change has also allowed me to look back and truly appreciate the support structure that I have in my friends and family. Without knowing what was to come they were there when I needed them and for that I owe them much.